WHAT DO YOU DO...
WHEN TRANSFORMATION CHOOSES YOU
When my grandmother Elma passed, I felt a shift. I found this to be odd because I never considered myself to be close to her; it was more like an admiration from afar. She represented worldliness, had a cosmopolitan air about her and was coolly detached from the family. I know these sound like strange things to respect but in a family that’s a little wacky (and whose family isn’t?) it seemed mysterious to me.
Subconsciously I began to take some cues from her as I became older; I longed to travel, loved perfumes and was usually able to see both points of view in any given situation without attachment to an outcome. However, over time the connection went much deeper; in her later years, she became fascinated with the spirit world. I never had a chance to ask her why, but she began to regularly meet with mediums and psychics. She began to include my mom and I in her sessions. Soon I found myself as a teenager confronted with a medium and as any normal teenager, I would ask about meeting my soulmate (I was told that I would have more than one which didn’t make sense to me at the time, but as an adult I began to understand).
Growing into a young woman, other things started falling into place as I began to explore the world she was so curious about. In college, I played psychic games with my friends, read tarot cards (my mom gave me my first set), experimented with spells (The Craft was popular back then)…until it reached a crescendo when I was having coffee with a friend and the coffee jug moved towards my cup and pointed at it. My friend had been talking about her boyfriend and I was distracted by the desire to satisfy my caffeine fix, until I redirected my attention to what she was saying. So the coffee jug moved in response to my thoughts.
This of course freaked me out! I stopped all exploration and play with the unknown. For fifteen years I kept to the straight and narrow. I dated, fell in love, got married, got divorced. Life moved on and I was doing okay. Even though something was nagging at my subconscious, I filled it with partying, drinking, work, travel and endless journaling. Then my grandmother passed away and everything shifted in my world.
On February 14th, she left this earthly existence for the one she was so curious about. On that day I decided to join her again in her adventure, not only to honor her but to honor the gift that was given to me and the women in our family. I know this world and the next are not separate. They are intimately connected; one cannot have life without death and our loved ones never really leave us. They’re literally just on the other side, only a breath away. If we can embrace that our energy is real, there is so much that we can do with it. This is why I chose to come back to the path of awareness – to embrace life, to be open to spirit and to allow love to move freely through me – so that I can walk in both worlds and assist others in their journey to find their soul calling and true path. This path has led me to create a wonderful online community of healers and practitioners as well as embrace my gift of tarot and energy work in service to others. As I continue this work with divine energy, I can’t imagine life any other way. I have my grandmother to thank for my renewed journey into the next chapter of living in this world.
We all have gifts, bestowed upon us by the divine and embedded in our essence through our ancestors. If we don’t take the time to explore, embrace and nurture them, they can be lost and we might never know our full potential as we were meant to be as human beings on this earth. I hope my story of transformation encourages you to find your gift and bring it into the light so that you can truly shine as the amazing person I know you are!
originally posted on New Age Journal